My Dad lived his entire life in Germany, but as a father he spent too much time in Texas instead of Albuquerque. His record as a dad is at best a mixed one. He was smart, educated, successful, hard-working, good at providing, involved and respected in the community and in church, trying to give his sons opportunities in life, all the while abusing alcohol, beating the living daylights out of us, flying off the handle at a moment’s notice, and doing a good job at what God warns dads against, “Fathers, do not exasperate (embitter, aggravate, provoke) your children, so that they will not (become discouraged) lose heart” Colossians 3:21 (NASB, parenthesis mine).
I didn’t share this about my Dad to make him look bad or to somehow get back at him, he died and was buried a long time ago. What I am wondering about today is my own Dad record because every dad has one. I can tell you this, if you are a father of a child, your Dad record has a huge impact. My father impacts me to this day, and it took me an awfully long time to deal with the crap of his Dad record. But I am responsible for my own Dad record, and the impact I am having on my kids’ lives.
A man once stopped by the church looking for help. He wanted to buy a bus ticket to somewhere in Texas. He said it was the next stop in his journey of finding himself. I asked him how finding himself was going. He told me he was having the time of his life. I asked him to tell me a bit more about his life. He didn’t really want to, but he finally told me he had a wife and three kids in Albuquerque. I offered to buy him a ticket to Albuquerque, so he could get back to be near his kids, get a job, and help provide for them. He didn’t like that at all, he needed more time to find himself. I told him he was full of it and he would have to find his own way to Texas. He stormed off telling me I wasn’t much of preacher, and he might be right.
I told you about this traveling man in case, like me, you are father, because once you are one (whether or not you planned to be one makes no difference) you have God-given dad responsibility. If you put a child into this world, doing right by that girl or boy, in a way that will make God nod with approval, is one of your chief and life-long responsibilities. If you have a child, you will have a Dad record, the only question will be what kind – mixed, decent, so-so, awesome, godly, absent, uninvolved, abusive, cold, tender, the worst, the best … There are too many dads in Texas when they are needed in Albuquerque.
I have been privileged, blessed, to be a Dad for 37 years now. I am telling you so you know that they have been out of diapers for a long time, in fact, they are out of our house, which was the plan, and I am proud as can be of them. But I am not done being a Dad, I am still adding to my Dad resume (and Opa/Grandpa record, which is also part of the Dad resume). What kind of older and all-too-soon old Dad will I be? I really am concerned about that. I have seen too many Dads blow it in the tail-end of life, get off the godly trail, forsake being a blessing, quit being a spiritual example, and instead celebrate the selfish life, become hard and difficult to deal with, and move to Texas when they should be in Albuquerque adding to their Dad (Grandpa) resume.
I think Dads from Albuquerque lived and wrote the following: Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers. Psalm 1:1-6 (NIV)
LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill? He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong and casts no slur on his fellowman, who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the LORD, who keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends his money without usury and does not accept a bribe against the innocent. He who does these things will never be shaken. Psalm 15:1-5 (NIV)
A good Dad leaves an inheritance to his children’s children. Proverbs 13:22a
Dad, Grandpa, it is not too late to move back to Albuquerque.
To God be all glory. Love you, Pastor Hans