Little Big Things – Words – How We Say What We Say“And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” Colossians 3:17 (NLT2)As a lousy speller, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate “spell check” and “Grammarly,” without them these p-notes of mine would be unreadable, although I am sure many of still cringe at my use of the English language. However, spell-checking by itself is not enough, it won’t pick up using a rightly spelled wrong word, it won’t reign in my twisted grammar. My words need multiple checks, yours probably do too. It is like that with all of our words, all our communications, because it is not just what we say that is important but also how we say it. Love and kindness, and humility are not optional to the serious Christian life, to a Holy Spirit filled and directed life. You can say, “I love you,” and not really mean it. Were you ever told to apologize right now and say, “I’m sorry,” but you really didn’t mean it and although you said the words you weren’t sorry one bit?Can you be too loving, too kind, too humble, too meek? Maybe, but judging by my own self and most people I have met we are not even close to the too loving, too kind, too humble line, so we might as well hide behind it.We are capable, you know, to speak words and even say difficult things wrapped in love. We can decide to propagate our speech with kindness. We are able to check our pride, to edit our tendency to self-promote, to look at things from more than our own viewpoints, to use our words to benefit the listeners.Just because we want to say it does not mean we should, especially if we are mad, disgusted, frustrated, bitter, disappointed, hurt, rushed, exhausted, betrayed, unappreciated, under-valued, treated wrongly, or are suffering an injustice. “Well it needed to be said and I’m glad I said it!” sounds good, but still is no excuse to leave love, kindness, and humility behind. We are so good at defending ourselves even when we are wrong, aren’t we?Scripture tells us to:
- “Speak the truth in love.”Ephesians 4:1
- “What is desirable in a man is his kindness, And it is better to be a poor man than a liar. Proverbs 19:22 (NASB)
- A woman of excellence,“She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:26 (NASB)
- “Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:12-17 (NIV)
What happens when we divorce our words from the right attitudes, a godly tone, a Christlike heart? It becomes easy to speak (and type) harsh, self-righteous, divisive, manipulative, destructive, hateful, two-faced, deceptive, proud and arrogant words. Good words are robbed of their ability to bless, to heal, to encourage, to produce good. An “I love you,” becomes twisted. An “I am so sorry,” drives a deeper wedge. A good word or praise breeds distrust, “What does he really want.” Listeners are not better off for having heard them.Right words are almost impossible without a right heart, but oh how refreshing it is to be on the listening end of right words from a good heart. The two of us, let’s keep praying and practicing the scripture below and both of us will be better off be. “May the words of my mouth (all my words) and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.” Psalm 19:14 (NIV, parenthesis mine)To God be all glory. Love you, Pastor Hans