For as long as have had the awesome, God-given, privilege of being a Dad I have wondered about the best things a Dad can do for his kids. My motivation was that I did not want to screw up, hurt, or negatively impact the lives of the children entrusted to Susie and me, instead I wanted to be a source of blessing, a contributor to my children’s success, a source of joy, and an example of wisdom, integrity, faith, and godliness. Thus I have observed, picked the brains of Dad’s I admired, read books, contemplated, attended seminars, and studied the God’s word (the Bible). Here are a few things I have learned:Don’t
- Be stupid. Stupid is never funny, kid’s pay a high price for parental stupidity.
- Be absent. You can never be a good Dad if you don’t show up.
- Be drunk, high, or addicted, unless you want to curse your children.
- Be violent or abusive. A strong and good man does not hurt or abuse his children.
- Be a jerk, you’ll make your children angry.
- Think that giving your kids stuff will make anything.
- Live your dreams through your kids.
- Chase the American dream, have a kingdom of God dreams instead.
- Break your word or lie. Let your children be able to trust what you say.
- Sin, sin is always corrosive and destructive. And if you sin do don’t cover it up but quick to repent.
Do
- Get involved in your children’s lives, you they will be the richer for it.
- Show your love in as many ways as you can. There is safety in love.
- Affirm your kids in who they are, help them to be all that God has made them to be.
- Laugh, have a great sense of humor. If your kids make fun of us in front of us they’re not afraid of us. This will also help in not making mountains out of mole hills.
- Have a plan, a clear picture of what you want your kids to be like. Great parents don’t leave things up to chance.
- Have standards when it comes to conduct, character, courage, commitment, chores, community, charity, quality (working hard and doing things right), compromise, and compassion. Make sure you model them or it will be a tough sell.
- Love their Mom, openly, constantly, and beautifully. It sets a tone. It exposes your kids to something rare and precious, it will also undermine their efforts to divide and conquer.
- Earn and require respect. Respecting Mom, siblings, other people (even those who you don’t like or disagree with) is not an option.
- Make room for expressing anger, but never let anger be expressed in sinful ways. This means you have to be really good at it yourself.
- Apologize when you messed up. Eat crow when you need to. Model how to take responsibility and not make excuses.
- Encourage your kids to dream, to try things, to not be afraid of failure.
- Use your mouth to bless your kids, to sow good things into their hearts and minds, to cheer, to encourage, to be kind, to build up, to be straight forward, to set a beautiful tone in your home and your relationship with them.
- Love all the things God loves: Jesus Christ, people, the church, the Bible, generosity, justice, compassion, creation, doing good, sinners being found, worship, praise, blessing others.
- Pray yourself, as a family, with their Mom, with others. Pray constantly, pray bold, pray with your mind and heart engaged. Ask for big and important things regarding your children and family. Pray beyond everything to merely be smooth and effortless in your children’s lives.
- Strive to be consistent in your conduct, discipline, and behavior.
- Shoot for being the godliest Dad you could possibly be, for your kid’s to be able to call you a man of God.
Ancient King David is near the end of his life. He is busy organizing everything so his son Solomon is set up for success, and then David prays, “Give my son Solomon the wholehearted desire to obey all your commands, laws, and decrees, and to do everything necessary to build this Temple, for which I have made these preparations” 1 Chronicles 29:19 (NLT).To God be all glory. Happy Fathers’ Day, Pastor Hans