Learning Love That Does Not Fail

Learning Love That Does Not Fail“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,” Ephesians 5:25 (NIV).“Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God…These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands …” Titus 2:3-4 (NLT).Somehow we believe that the awesome feeling of being “in love” easily translates into a life of love, that “living happily ever after” will surely happen. Of course statistics tell us otherwise, not only do more than half of all marriages end in the divorce but the reality those who choose to stay together is that many are far from a romantic dream.When God had Paul pen the instructions you read above marriages were by and large arranged. Love was not the predominant factor in marriage making, economics, connections, and even politics played a big role in who got married to who. That in a way explains the need for instructing married people to learn how to love each other. But what about today? Simply because we have the freedom to choose whom we want to marry does not mean there are not other factors involved, such as physical attraction, emotional needs, romantic dreams, and economics. The reality is that even with our freedom to choose most marriages end up far from the hopes and dreams that marked their beginning.Falling in love is easy; it just kind of seems to happen. Who doesn’t love a good “love at first sight story?” The notion of twitterpation that knocks you of your feet (and senses) is intoxicating. Who doesn’t want to feel such passionate love and have it requited? But what happens when the pheromones wear off? At some point in a romantic relationship, in marriage, more is needed to sustain, to grow, and to carry it. At some point the reality of how we got into this gets exposed, our best behavior returns to our normal behavior, our charm gets to be annoying, our flaws become evident, our bad habits resurface, our past we try to escape reaches for us. It is then that we can fall out of love almost as quickly as we fell into it. It is then and there that we have to learn to love.No one can teach you and I more about love and how to love than God, who is love (1 John 4:16). In learning to love God first and most we paradoxically do not end up loving our partner less but more and better. We usually go about it the other way and begin with our partner and in the process make him/her our idol, our object of worship, and nothing good comes from it. God doesn’t force himself into our romances, into our marriages, but we are smart to invite Him in if we want to learn all about love, if we want to bless one another with true love, lasting love, love that bears new blossoms throughout life, love that does not fail (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a).To God be all glory, love you, Pastor Hans